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Nameless is taking a break.

Hello everyone!

I come with sad news today. If you are a lover of Nameless, I am sad to announce that it will be taking a break as of today. It will be back in a few weeks, so worry not.

I just felt like it was not going anywhere  and I was no longer feeling it. If that makes sense.

So for the meanwhile, please enjoy Reaping Love which is published every Saturday.

Noku

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Random

Bae? Not really.

Other people:

“I’m going to call bae!”

“I’m going away with bae for the weekend.”

Me:

What is a “bae”?

I legit do not get the usage of the word bae. It confuses me to the extreme. Like, my knowledge tells me that bae is an acronym for: before anyone else. Scoff. Before anyone else. Like, how can a person that you, most likely, have not known for more than a year be put before anyone else in your life?

Bae should be used when speaking with your parents. No, not about your “significant other”. Calling your parents bae and calling your siblings and relatives bae. Because you have known them forever. Because they are the one’s who deserve to be put before any other guy or gal that you decide to start a relationship with.

“Bae” will leave you someday. Bae will not always be there for you. Bae will no longer be bae. I’m really not sorry for my honesty.

I’ve just suddenly realised that there are some people who treat their significant other better than they do their family. How sad is that? Like, you’ll steal your sister’s boyfriend and she will still come and comfort you when he breaks up with you. She’ll most likely laugh first and explain just how much you deserved it, but she will still be there. She won’t stop loving you. She won’t tell you to go dig yourself a whole and cry there instead (she might actually).

Your siblings and your parents, they are the one’s who deserve that name. Not the guy who has a ninety percent chance of leaving.

That’s the end of the rant. Really not sorry about it. What do you think about the usage of the word bae? Do you think that it is justified to be used to a stranger, or to someone who actually deserves it?

Please leave your comments below.

P.S. I need a rant category. LOL

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Build Up.

Because not everyone will get you.

I hate it when someone looks at what I am doing–for example, watching k-pop–frown and then go “Why are you watching Chinese people?”

Cough cough. I shan’t murder. Cough cough.

I mean, asking what I am doing is one thing. Deciding to make a face and state what you think I am doing and actually guessing incorrectly… And then people ask me why I am so quiet. It’s a matter of I don’t like being judged by the likes of you.

Because let’s be honest, you will get judged no matter what you do…

This is not a rant. (I’m laughing as I write this because I lost track of topic.)

Before I wrote this, I was thinking about how our fear of the dark as kids could have been somewhat of a metaphor. The dark being people. Don’t roll your eyes just yet. Legit, I was thinking about this for a while.

You know how you think you know someone and then one day they show you a different side of them that you never even knew existed? That is like the darkness. (LOL, what am I saying?) I was told once that there were two sides of a person. The good, the bad. The light, the dark. The person and the shadow.

Even the nicest of people will someday show you their true colours. Actually, the nicest people people are the one’s  who you need to take a step back, maybe even run, because when nice people show their true colours the world seems to stop spinning. It becomes that shocking.

So you don’t know how the darkness in people actually connect to judging others? I also don’t know.

I just thought I’d share this. Because I’d experienced people changing a lot. It does not always mean that they are bad, though. Sometimes people have had enough. Sometimes it happens that a lot of things are happening in their lives. Then you come along, be annoying (or even don’t) and they explode because of all the build up. Some people try to hold in their pain, when they are supposed to let it out instead.

That is mostly introverted people. They most likely will not share their problems with every Tom, Dick and Harry. They confide in very few people. Sometimes find it a bit too hard to confide in anyone at all. So they’ll have problems and no one to tell them to.

So when a quiet person suddenly explodes. It’s not because they have always been evil and deceitful, but because they couldn’t hold it in anymore. They don’t hate you (actually they might, sorry for pointing that out), they just need patience, and maybe a bit talking to.

Introverts are quite funny people. I’m an introvert and sometimes want to slap myself silly, because I am so strange. I could try to change. It’s gonna be worse than keeping to new year’s resolutions. I won’t change though.

Why should I? This is me. My personality makes me a great writer too (bonus!).

So don’t expect anyone else to change because you prefer them to be more like you. Stop. You’re not that great.

Okay, so maybe this was a rant.

I think I need to change the blog to Good Rant Lover.

I legit hope you got the last line…


Comment on what you think about what I stated. Do you agree or disagree with me. I’d like to hear from you. – Noku

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My personality.

The question was: What do you dislike about yourself?

The answer is, my personality.

I mean, I don’t really hate it, because it is who I am.  My personality type is INFP. So,  I am mostly introverted and find it hard to communicate with others. I’ve hated myself for that for a very long time. Sometimes I still do hate it and even try to be someone who I am not.

At home I was taught to be myself, but school (social expectations) made me feel like because of my personality type I was weird, strange, unapproachable. That obviously made me even more introverted and I started to hate myself.

But the older I got, the more I learnt to love myself for who I am. I, honestly, easily become exhausted when I am in large groups of people and try to “fit in”. I hate being fake, or rather, trying too hard to be who I’m not. I sometimes envy the people who have a lot of friends and are able to talk in large groups of people. I envy how people are sometimes easily able to express themselves to anyone and everyone that they meet.

I mean, the closet friends that I have ever had are the one’s from high school. I’ve had them for four years and I still find it hard to fully trust them. I hate myself for that. But I do love my friends and they also love me for who I am.

But let’s say that the question was changed to become: What do you like about yourself?

The answer would be, my personality.

Quite indecisive, I am. I love my personality type because I am able to think things through. I don’t try too hard to fit in and when I don’t like something, I can be able to let it go. I am curious. I mean, I am learning Korean at the moment. I am one of the most curious people that I know (true story).

If I had been a different personality type, I would probably be somewhere else. I wouldn’t be studying copywriting, or thinking about travelling when I am done studying. I wouldn’t feel so obsessed with nature and the different cultures of my country and the world.

I hate my personality because it is so hard to fit in, I don’t have a lot of friends and I am easily annoyed (seriously).

I love my personality because it is who I am.

Love yourself. Don’t let others make you feel worthless. Being an introvert does not make you strange. Embrace the introvert within.

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Rainy with a chance of suffering

I love rain. I love how rain makes the flowers grow and how it helps the rivers stay running. I love how it keeps us cool and… Okay, that’s about it.

I do love rain, until it comes unexpectedly. I left my umbrella because I believed that it would not rain. I mean, there were a few clouds in the sky. The sun was out!

And then all of a sudden, the monstrous showers could be heard from inside our windowless building. So now as I am sitting here, I am praying that the rain stops and the sun comes out. I am grateful for the rain and all the good it has done for us. But if it persists then I will have no choice but to run home.

I mean, I could stay in school for a while, but it’s Friday and I want to go to my flat and binge watch series.

(Where is the shaking head, depressed emoji when you need one? Sigh.)

It’s been a while since I posted, so I was just passing through.

It’s almost the weekend… Technically, it is the weekend. I hope everyone can have a great time and beware of the rain. Always have an umbrella by your side. Because I swear the rain is out to get me.

Logging out,

Noku

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Being Human

SORRY FOR THE MEAN ACCURATE THINGS I SAID

So I found this very interesting sentence on Pinterest (because Pinterest is life) and it made me think.

When I am angry, I tend to become a ticking time bomb. I mean, recently I have learnt to tone myself down and channel all of my anger into the penetrating glares that I give to those who have upset thee (just used that in a sentence, three cheers for me!)

Most of the time when I am angry with someone, I just glare and then walk away, leaving them feeling like I have something else planned. I just go to my room, shut the door and then leave everyone to think about what they just did. Reverse psychology, I reckon.

Honestly, once I got angry and said some really mean things to my little sister. They were not too mean, but I knew that she still took them to heart. I regretted it. I hated myself for a few minutes, and with the pride I couldn’t even go apologise properly.

That is why, usually when I am upset, I just go sit alone until I calm down. It’s like when you are fighting with someone (verbally, of course), you come up with all the mean things to say to that person. All the things that you know will hurt them just so that you can feel victorious.

So let’s say you do say those things. How would you feel afterward? Would you be happy about yourself ? (I mean if you would, sorry. Carry on to the next post.) I wouldn’t. I would be so guilty that I wouldn’t even be able to sleep at night. If you are not that type of person, then good for you, but most people do feel regret. Most people do want to go apologise but are held back by their pride.

It is human nature.

We are human. Never forget that.

We say and do things that we will most likely regret, and then do it again and again and again. It’s a non-ending cycle of stupid, really.

So my advise for you today (if you have read ‘til this far) is stop and think. Think about what you are going to say. Yes, you are angry. Yes, the person is an idiot that was raised in Stupid Ville, but think about how they are going to feel. Think about how you will feel.

You are human. You also have emotions. You also know how it would feel like if someone told you what you were about to tell that person.

Stop and think. Don’t hurt others for your own temporary satisfaction. It’s not worth it. Not for you. Not for the other person.

We are all human. Remember that.

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When are you the happiest?

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Okay children, sit down. It is story time…

Sorry about that. I couldn’t help myself.

When am I the happiest? That a difficult question to answer. I mean, it rather easy, I just have too many answers.

I am the happiest when I am with my family. When I see them smiling. When my parents decide to be disgustingly romantic in front of us. When my little sister is laughing at my stupid jokes. When my older sisters are laughing at my stupid jokes. When we make up after a fight. When we listen to each other when we have problems. When I see them succeeding. I am just the happiest knowing that my family is still there for each other. No matter how unstable we feel sometimes, I’m still happy knowing that most of the time we are stronger than cable ties.

Sob, right? Sorry about that.

I’m also very happy when I am learning new things. Learning a new fact about the world around us and learning to protect it. Being as privileged as I am, I have the means to search new things on the internet. I am able to buy a new book if I want to and learn even more. I am able to learn about India, China, America, and all the other places and it makes me happy every time I learn something knew about my world-mates. It feels accomplishing learning something new and having others learn with you. I mean, doesn’t it make you happy?

I am happy when I am able to make others happy. I legit feel lighter when someone smiles because of me. Or when someone smiles at me. Seeing others happy and being happy for them. It is another type of humane feeling that I am not sure if most people know because what they mostly concentrate on is fulfilling their goals, not caring how the end result will affect everyone else. It is a happiness that I cherish and let sink in. Knowing that I can actually make others happy is extraordinary. Try it. Smile at someone today. Like someone’s picture on Instagram that you usually wouldn’t like. Make someone’s day and let the happiness embrace you with its warmth.

Something else that makes me super happy is writing. Like I was doing when I was writing this. I always start unsure if what I am writing is correct, or if I should even be writing it, but then I finish. Looking at the end result is always a pleasant feeling. Accomplishing something as mundane as writing really makes me happy. I’m not sure how others feel about writing, but I love it. I love how my fingers seem to have a mind of their own whenever I pick up at pen or open my laptop to write. I love just reading through my work over and over and over. Doesn’t the feeling of looking at you work, no matter how bad you decide it is, make you happy? Just knowing how you made that. How you created something that makes you happy. Sometimes I become so happy when I write that I get emotional. My words come to life when I write them. That makes me the happiest.

It might sound impossible, but everything that I wrote down makes me the happiest. The little things make me enthralled to be able to be alive today and be able to actually feel the happiness that everyone else feels, even if it lasts for a short time.

Today I choose life. Every morning when I wake up I can choose joy, happiness, negativity, pain… To feel the freedom that comes from being able to continue to make mistakes and choices – today I choose to feel life, not to deny my humanity but embrace it.

-Kevyn Aucoin

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